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The Indefinite Article.

Friday, September 03, 2004

The Daddy Files

so the baby is dressed in jeans, his white shoes, and a white tshirt. he look adorable as we are dropping off his mom at work. he cries, but i take him to mc donalds on kirby and 59.

i take him out of the car. he is saying, "...eggies, pancase..." he's hungry. i know he is. i feel like we might look like one of those mc d's commercials: happy son, happy daddy on a day off from school and work.

there are a lot of cars for the drive thru so i carry him in. i carry him up to the counter where i order two deluxe big breakfasts -- lots of eggies and pancakes. i order an apple juice for him....

"...and i'll have just a mi....

it is at this point, in my arms, that adolfo iv unleashes a tidal wave of cheesy milky vomit that drenches my entire left side (shirt & pants), drenches his little body, face, arms, and spills to the floor like a brilliant hawaiian waterfall. i am not joking when i say there was a lot. i mean, a lot. a whole lot. my whole face dropped. the man behind me had a laugh aching to bust through his teeth. the lady behind the register handed me a bunch of paper towels with a completely straight face.

i remain calm. i apologize to both the people immediately around me. As we walk to the bathroom i can hear the lady at the register calling for a mop. I pull off his shirt and try to clean him up as best i can. i have no spare clothes for him. i pull off his shirt and rinse it out int he sink. i use it to wipe up his pants. i do nothing about my own drenched shirt.

i get our food through the drive thru and head towards adolph's house, hoping he is home. he's not home. adolfo is clamoring for food in the back seat. i give him half a biscuit as i start down san jacinto towards home. i give him a little bit of egg.

i get closer to downtown.

somewhere right before the bus station he pukes again. everything. pukes almost as bad as the first tiem. the car seat is covered in puke. his pants are soaked. eggs, biscuit and more cheesy milky puke is everywhere. i pull over into a side street immediately and step out of the car and into the back seat. i have a limited amount of wipies. i clean him up with what i have and the wet shirt i had taken off of him earlier.i take him out of his seat and wipe up the seat too.

at this point i am a little frustrated.

i get him back in the seat and he starts clamoring for more food. i explain to him that i can't give him anything till we get home, which we do quickly.

at home he gets water and a movie to help him relax a little bit....

just now he ate a whole pancake in about 2 mins. he is hungry. clamoring for food. i am waiting to see if its going to come back up. i suspect that it won't, but you never can tell...


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